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:iconyamikatherine:

~YamiKatherine

is a stubborn wiseass
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Thu Feb 16, 2006, 9:14 PM
Rant: Every voice in my head wants me to be somewhere different...it's pretty chaotic to be trapped in this head. .. And it wouldn't be so bad if this wasn't 24/7, second after second and day after day; even when I'm trying to SLEEP! My only escape is when I'm in non-REM sleep...and even then I can't stay still too much.
My immune-system is much to be desired and all my joints are always lined with this funky, painful puss—I dunno if I drink too much water or ingest too much salt or what—and I’m getting pretty tired of sitting bac in here while this excuse for me gets nauseous and stumbles around stupidly and ends up in rooms that she wandered into while in a deep daze, with no memory of how she got there! ..I have mind-blocks blocking me from my identity, for god's sake!!
My own medicine, stuff I’ve been taking sense I was really little, has decayed my mind and body and done this to me. What the HELL happened?? I was supposed to be president, win the Nobel Peace Prize, and write a autobiography consisting of my many rebellious beliefs, but now I can’t even remember what that funny taste in my mouth is! I would’ve gladly gone with the other voices then take the poison if I had only known..! And now I’m a useless SKITZO’ who can’t even communicate fully two-thirds of the time!! What HAPPENED!?!?
It's like being very sick but not being able to ever lie down.
I’m not kidding around...I just wanted to rant/complain about what my life has succumbed to. Thank you for reading.

No consciousness connecting me to the present;
No memories tying me to the past.
Inadimant thoughts wait quietly, patiently,
As my decaying mind and body gives it's last.

I hate this...
~~Your thoughts?
11 Comments

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:iconcryingcrimsontears:
~CryingCrimsonTears Feb 16, 2006, 9:40:15 PM
Don't down yourself. You sound a little chaotic in the mind. Schitzophrenic.. Have you asked your doctor about your medication?

Relax.. Calm down.
Work around, adapt.

Don't drown your dreams yet.. It's not over.

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:iconyamikatherine:
~YamiKatherine Feb 16, 2006, 10:48:05 PM
Thanks...but the medicine I take gives me these mental-mind-block-things that make it harder to think full thoughts each day and I have trouble controlling where my feet take me, so what's the use? My medicine's been lowered and it's gotten easier to think and all, but not by much...and alot of my medicine had been lowered.

--
Great minds do NOT think alike.
:iconfoggypebble: is my better, more active account. And Yu-Gi-Oh and YuYu Hakusho have the same characters.
:clone: :slow: :paranoid: :ambulance: :slow: :clone:
:iconriyunoa:
~riyunoa Feb 17, 2006, 2:05:52 AM
Whoa, sounds like you're hallucinating. O.O I think you're taking too much medicine still. It might be a severe overdose.

Hope you feel better soon. :hug:
:iconyamikatherine:
~YamiKatherine Feb 17, 2006, 3:01:09 AM
That's what my parents say...thanks for the imput

--
Great minds do NOT think alike.
:iconfoggypebble: is my better, more active account. And Yu-Gi-Oh and YuYu Hakusho have the same characters.
:clone: :slow: :paranoid: :ambulance: :slow: :clone:
:iconriyunoa:
~riyunoa Feb 17, 2006, 5:02:48 AM
I hope your parents do something about it soon. Then you can at least rest properly.
:iconyamikatherine:
~YamiKatherine Feb 17, 2006, 11:32:12 AM
It's in my sychiatrist's hands, actually. My parents know I'm overmedicated; I just forget to mention minusing my meds every time I see him...I dunno how I'd convince him to take away any meds to begin with, though. I told him all the problems I had in my rant-journal-entry and he just changed one of my pills. It hasn't done anything and he wants to up the dose.

--
Great minds do NOT think alike.
:iconfoggypebble: is my better, more active account. And Yu-Gi-Oh and YuYu Hakusho have the same characters.
:clone: :slow: :paranoid: :ambulance: :slow: :clone:
:iconriyunoa:
~riyunoa Feb 17, 2006, 2:29:05 PM
Ohh, I suppose he thinks that what you're experiencing was an allergy reaction. What do you mean, "misusing your meds"? Was it prescribed to take that kind of dosage?

I think what you have to do now, is to tell your parents and doctor that it isn't working, every single time you see him. After all, you know your body best. He's only assuming what happened... X__X;
:iconyamikatherine:
~YamiKatherine Feb 17, 2006, 2:35:47 PM
I said "minusing" actually

--
Great minds do NOT think alike.
:iconfoggypebble: is my better, more active account. And Yu-Gi-Oh and YuYu Hakusho have the same characters.
:clone: :slow: :paranoid: :ambulance: :slow: :clone:
:iconyamikatherine:
~YamiKatherine Feb 17, 2006, 2:36:06 PM
I said "minusing" actually

--
Great minds do NOT think alike.
:iconfoggypebble: is my better, more active account. And Yu-Gi-Oh and YuYu Hakusho have the same characters.
:clone: :slow: :paranoid: :ambulance: :slow: :clone:
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